Dealing with Death
by Funeral Home Resource Team
Dealing with Death – Everyone Goes Through It
Acceptance of losing a loved one is a tough task. Opening up your heart to express what you feel about the loss it is necessary that you first accept and digest the fact that he or she is no more. It is natural for the relatives or people extremely close to go into denial. But you cannot live in an illusive world and life is unfair as it is. You have to come to terms with the blaring truth. But that does not mean you rush into forcing yourself to take it in. It will take time to sink in a few days, months. It has to, eventually, because life has to go on.
Speak out as much as you want about that person and how you are feeling about his or her death. This will further help you get a grip on the truth. Cry, let out your emotions if you want to or feel like. Crying acts like a pressure system for your heart. The load of emotions sometimes gets a bit too much. Crying out gives you relief in such a situation. This is not to say that you cry so much so as to make your eyes puffy. The point is to express and vent your bottled feelings to family members and friends when dealing with grief after death.
Coping with grief over the loss of a loved one is not an overnight solution. Obviously it will take time for you to get out of the emotional setback. Time is the best healer, they say. Let some time go by. Be patient and make up your mind that it is a long process and it will take time.
Try and reach out to others with similar experience and exchange ideas and share the grief. If you are feeling 'WHY ME', then this might be a good option to ponder over. You will know that there are people like you, pained and aggrieved and shocked and traumatized. Be open to putting across your emotions and listening to what they have to say and vice versa. This way you would have helped the others in dealing with a death. You could also find some solace in spirituality if you are inclined towards it.
Dealing with Death – helping a child deal with death
Children grieve just as adults do. Any child old enough to form a relationship will experience some form of grief when someone they knew dies. Adults may not view a child behavior as grief as it is often demonstrated in ‘acting out’ or ‘getting into trouble'. When a death occurs, children need to be surrounded by feelings of warmth, acceptance and understanding. Encourage the child to express their feelings, concerns, or fears about death. Provide small amounts of information at a time about the circumstances, which allows the child to absorb what has taken place. Anxiety can hinder remembering what they were told, so the questioning concerns of children may be repeated.
Dealing with Death- helping a loved one grieve
Someone you know may be experiencing grief - perhaps the loss of a loved one, perhaps another type of loss - and you want to help. The fear of making things worse may encourage you to do nothing. Yet you do not wish to appear to be uncaring. Remember that it is better to try to do something, inadequate as you may feel, than to do nothing at all. The most important thing is to simply listen. Grief is a very confusing process; expressions of logic are lost on the griever. The question "tell me how you are feeling" followed by a patient and attentive ear will seem like a major blessing to the grief stricken.